OK this is a long one. Approximately 90 photos are below to tell the story. Grab a coffee and a burrito and we’ll get through this together in one piece. Here we go!
On Friday, 9/4/09, we flew out of PDX to Vancouver BC, one day before our cruise to Alaska. Tracy and I first cruised with her folks in January 2002 to the Mexican Riviera. We had a lot of fun and swore that we would do it again soon. (Well, “soon” finally came around 7 years later.)
We crashed at pals Ron and (Tracy’s former co-worker) Scotti’s place, along with their daughter Violet and dog Dexy. The weather held out while we sat on their deck and enjoyed the view of green trees, blue water and socialized medicine.

Anytime we mix little kids and beer, we try to have some fun with it (within reason, people!). Needless to say, this is where it all ended up. Even a recovering alcoholic would find this cute. Violet’s a true entertainer, and a great host, too!
The next day we got a tour of what I consider to be a truly international city – Vancouver, BC (not Vancouver, Washington…nothing international there except the occasional house of pancakes). After a drive through Stanley Park and various beaches and downtown fare, we were taken to Granville Island, a local Saturday market-type venue under a bridge and host to many fresh meats & produce, shops and entertainers making a buck.

Here’s a guy shooting hoops on a unicycle. Impressive, but reassured me that college was a good choice.

A wood carving station, making totem poles partially funded by the Canadian government.

A north-facing view of downtown from Granville Island.

C’mon! This is just too easy to use for a joke. Moving along….
So after a brief walk and lunch, we were dropped off at the port to board a boat. And a boat it was! The largest in Princess Cruise Lines’ entire fleet. The Sapphire Princess was to be our home on water for the next week.

A view of the port and downtown Vancouver from the front top deck on the SP.

The view from the other side of the top front deck.

Haven’t even left the dock yet and the drinks are already flowing. Somewhere hidden in this photo is a bummer of a cover band.

VACATION BEGINS NOW!!!

Once we go under this bridge, we’ll be on the other side of it.

I like to call this photo “Free Upgrade.” It’s an original piece that shows what getting a free upgrade to a room with a view on a cruise will be like. (Oh well…can’t really complain. The natural light was a nice value-add.) At least we knew where the nearest life raft was.
After a full Sunday at sea, we woke up Monday morning in the first port city of Ketchikan, Alaska.

Ketchikan is commonly known as “Alaska’s 1st city” because it’s typically the first stop any voyager trekking north would make, be they on a cruise or searching for gold.

Found this gem at the first gift shop right off the boat. I was immediately reminded “Oh that’s right! I’m now in Alaska!”

As a Freemason and a Shriner, I’m always interested in seeing the local Masonic Lodges and Temples throughout my travels. As you can see here, they come in all shapes and colors.

This is Creek Street. Once known for saloons and bordellos back in the day, it’s now used for saloon-themed duty-free and bordello-themed gift shops.

Along Creek Street is its namesake. This just happened to be salmon spawning season, so not only were there jumping fish (which eventually ended up dead on the side rocks, stinking up the town a tad), but also plenty of spawning innuendo to be overused at the bordello-themed gift shops.

The humor behind this photo needs no explanation. So I’ll move on.

A view of the south from a dock in Ketchikan. Dramatic skylines.

As you can see, there’s not much walking to do between getting off the boat and dumping your money on some authentic Alaskan jewelry.

This would be the only bear sighting of the vacation.

I figured a shot of a very old fishing boat (the Packer Star) with a somewhat more modern boat (the SP) in the background would be very fitting here.

A view of the SP from the dock. This thing was really huge. Have I mentioned that yet?

This view reminded Tracy of her hometown of Astoria. Similar city structure and architecture.

My normal hand gestures just wouldn’t work for this photo. I couldn’t do a metal sign because there is nothing metal at all about a cruise vacation or Alaska. And I couldn’t flip the bird because I was relaxing on vacation, and my Grandparents would likely be reading this.

Float planes (or bush planes) are a frequent mode of transport in Canada and Alaska. I guess when you have more water than asphalt, that’s bound to occur.

Parked behind us in Ketchikan was a Norwegian Cruise Line vessel. And parked to the boat’s right (our left) is…

the Aleutian Ballad, known to those who watch The Deadliest Catch on Discovery Channel. Residing in the Pacific Northwest means you’re nearly required to be familiar with this show, centered on the crab industry in the Bering Sea. As former viewers of that show, we were excited to see this boat in port. We quickly noticed that Norwegian passengers were boarding the Ballad for an exclusive ship-organized tour. We were rather jealous until we noticed…

the Ballad had been permanently converted into a tourist boat. What you see here is a covered seating area where the Ballad’s crew perform a demo that shows what life is like on a crab boat (minus the stage, seating, microphone and complimentary champagne). This bummed us out a bit, but mostly because we didn’t see this until right before our boat was scheduled to leave port.
So as were were leaving Ketchikan, I quickly remembered that this town was where the now-infamous “Bridge to Nowhere” was to be installed. For those who don’t recall, the BtN was an overbudgeted project once endorsed (then suddenly not) by one-time Alaska Governor and 2008 VP candidate Sarah Palin (my favorite nutty politician of all-time!). As we were leaving, I noticed the Ketchikan International Airport just ahead.

Yep, that’s it. It’s only “international” because you can get to Canada via this airport.

Residents of Ketchikan (pop. 13K year-round) currently take a $5 ferry ride across the river to get to the airport. At a projected cost of $398 million, you can already sense why it was a hot-button issue for the 2008 presidential campaign.

The airport appears to have only one jetway leading out of the building, and a parking lot for approximately 40 to 50 vehicles.

That one jetway is served by (you guessed it) Alsaka Airlines.

Tracy joked that this was as far as the Bridge to Nowehere project got before running out of funds.

After the political ridicule, we ventured inside the boat for some wine tasting.

Oh yeah, this trip was also a partial celebration of our 4th wedding anniversary, and the boat was kind enough to send us a yummy cake.
We arrived in Juneau Tuesday morning. Another small town filled with touristy jewelry stores and gift shops full of items that say Alaska on them. While Juneau, was kind of disappointing, it did have the one thing we went out of the way to see: the Alaskan Brewing Company. While their “tour” was merely a room with old beer bottles and a DVD player showing the brewing process (and a window to see the large metal vats of beer), they did offer free beer samples, which were amazingly good. They get nearly exclusive use of some of the best water in the country (as they say, you can’t make good beer without good water), so all of their products were quite delicious. After some samples, we purchased a few items from the gift shop and made our way back to the port.

The first thing you notice off the boat is the Mt. Roberts tram. Of course we wanted to go up to the top. Anyone who doesn’t like trams is either acrophobic or a jerk. But the price was $27 for an all-day pass. Not bad, but we really only needed to use the tram once, and since they did not have any kind of “honor system discount,” we decided we would pass on that expense.

In Juneau we also started noticing these signs in the windows of many gift shops. While this is certainly nothing to be ashamed of, I did notice that these signs mainly appeared in the windows of gift shops that were not run by either East Indians or African Americans, so I couldn’t help but detect a slight undertone of racism attached to these signs. Am I reading into them too much? Yeah, probably.

This was probably the most unique thing we could find in Juneau. At first we thought it might be a local artist’s vision of protesting the daily invasion of tourists. But then we quickly realized that it was just carefully-arranged garbage, likely created by tourists.

A view of the port/marina in Juneau.

Once back on the boat, I began working on one of many shrimp cocktails throughout the week. I think this was #12.

Wednesday morning we woke up in Skagway, AK, pop. 800 year-round (3K seasonal).

The hillside rocks on the other side of the dock were painted with various tributes to all ships that have docked there, dating back to the 1970’s.

Another view of the dock and painted hillside from the Lido deck. Only 20 steps to a train ride! Skagway is impressing us so far.

A view of 1st street in downtown Skagway.

As an official historic town, all buildings must maintain at least 40% of the original facade. What you do inside is YOUR business.

Funny how the smallest town on our trip was the only one serving Starbucks coffee. (NOTE: not an actual Starbucks…just serving their coffee.)

Intersection of 1st and Broadway. The entire town is a grid of 5 by 20 blocks, so this shot almost covers the entire town.

Arctic Brotherhood building. The most photographed building in Alaska. Facade contains over 7K pieces of driftwood. I just like it cuz my initials are on the front.

Another Alaskan town…another funny restaurant sign.

Tracy taking a photo of…

this. (We’re not above a little toilet humor.)

A view of the port. Our cruise ship on the left. Marina in the middle. Competitor cruise ships on the right. Cool mountains in the back.

Cool caddy in front of…

a former courthouse-now-museum.
So we couldn’t go on a cruise without signing up for at least one official shore excursion, right? So we picked a cheaper one called “Ghosts and Goodtime Girls of Skagway.” And it’s exactly what the title suggests. A historical walking tour about the alleged hauntings and world’s oldest profession in a gold rush town that once had a population of over 20K (late 1800’s / early 1900’s). The tour desk operator on the boat told us we picked a good tour, and he was 100% right.

Our tour guide was a 2006 theater grad from Houston who dressed up as an old west Madam, and gave quite the presentation. Had plenty of history and innuendo to keep everything interesting. NOT recommended for anyone under 16!

The now well-to-do Skagway Inn is a converted brothel. This is known as the “john door.” If you caused any trouble during your exchange, this was your exit, and you hoped it was snowing a lot that day.

The back steps to the Skagway Inn. It started raining, but nobody seemed to mind, as we were not only prepared, but also enthralled with the tour.

A brief stop on the tour. Wait! What’s that on the stop sign?

Skagway just keeps getting cooler. (The look on the old guy’s face is just an added bonus for this shot.)

Journey is such a cool band that they even got their hit song to be used as graffiti in remote Alaska. Way to go Steve Perry!

Inside the Red Onion Saloon, the coup de grace of brothels back in the day. Now the coup de grace of bar / food / gift shops in Skagway. The owner bought this place in the 60’s and did a lot of restoration work, maintaining as much of the original contents as possible. I highly suggest looking this place up if you’re in the area.

Ladies’ undergarments of the era. Weighs in at approx. 10 lbs.

Bathroom with a view of downtown.

Alaska does a good job keeping cigarette butts off the street.

Another view of our boat from the port. Notice the people to the left of the boat. Yep, it was that big.

This was awaiting us when we returned to our room. So now everyone knows we’re celebrating something. Thanks Princess!

A client of mine who used to work for Princess Cruises had this sent to us. That was very nice!
We left Skagway (our favorite port of the trip) Wednesday evening for two days of “scenic cruising” before the end of the trip. Thursday had us in Glacier Bay National Park, accessible only by boat with permit.

Our view of the glacier from the boat. Much bigger and more impressive than what you can see here.

Right edge of the same glacier.

A shot of the boat to give some perspective.
Unfortunately, we had to leave Glacier Bay much earlier than expected due to a storm front in the Gulf of Alaska. In order to make it to the next day’s stop in College Fjord on time, we would have to haul booty through the gulf and the expected (and eventual) 10-to-15-foot swells. Needless to say, there are no more photos of Thursday, as we figured we could spare you the shots of the bounty of bread, water and dramamine in our room. We woke up to much calmer waters Friday morning en route to College Fjord.

A tranquil shot of Friday morning in Alaska.

An unknown island that I’m sure has a name having to do with a native Alaskan tribe or a US Senator.
After lunch we parted ways while I played poker and Tracy wandered off somewhere. After my poker game, I quickly realized we were in College Fjord. I ran up to the Lido deck to snap some photos and try to find Tracy.

The face of the glacier and little icebergs throughout.

Same glacier to the left.

View from the boat. This gives you a good idea of how close to the glacier we really were.

Close-up show of the glacier with mountains in the back.

Another view from the Sun (or overcast in this case) deck on the boat.

This deck sits on top of the navigation bridge. Very popular spot.

Close-up shot of the biggest iceberg I could find in the area.

More viewing from above the bridge.

On the other side of the boat: more glaciers, mountains and icebergs.

We were literally surrounded by icebergs. I wasn’t too concerned, but I saw Titanic enough times to know that icebergs are bad for boats.

Leaving College Fjord, Tracy snapped this with her iPhone.
We spent Friday evening packing, slamming down wine and getting ready to fly home. We arrived in Whitter and took a bus for 75 miles to Anchorage airport on Saturday morning, arriving in Portland that afternoon. When we got home, Tracy’s Mom picked us up and took us home where Danzig was excited to see us return. Danzig spent all week in the lap of luxury in Astoria, and was quite bummed when he realized he was back home in the normal routine of being cooped up while Tracy and I are stuck at work. Since he did such a good job while we were away (and since his corner blankets were on their last threads), we bought him a new bed for the living room:

Now it’s the first place he goes to pout when he misses his Grandma.
OK I spent two hours putting this together. I’m calling it a night. Thanks for reading!
–A(&T)